A silent prayer for love since years
Has been answered with an ocean of tears
Love can neither be forever nor be pure
It can only hurt way beyond we can endure
Every time one hopes and tries to be glad
Love or the lack of it makes life look a fad
Not by designs, its mere destiny
That gloom is gargantuan, happiness so tiny
No one can ever truly tell
When the cup of sorrow will quell
It takes forever to light a smile
Even then, it stays for just a while
It bleeds the heart to live like this
Instead a drawn out death maybe a bliss
For whats the point in carrying on
When clouds of despair make life forlorn
But what if the death awaited is not an angel too
For how a happy end be to life where smiles were few
How can it all wrap up on a happy note
When the journey so far has been in a sinking boat!!!
Thursday, January 17, 2008
Why?
Been reading "The notebook" by Nicholas Spark these days. A story celebrating the love of a much married couple, of a wife battling Alzheimer's and of her husband trying to save her from sinking into the ocean of obscurity. For the sake of love they shared. For the sake of togetherness they once enjoyed.
Makes me wonder. Why are real people in real life not like that? Happiness in life comes in either never or so late that one doesn't even enjoy it anymore. As one of my favorite songs goes:
Bin tere koi aas bhi naa rahi
Itne tarsey ke pyaas bhi naa rahi
Joys are joys when they come in at the right time. Too early, and we don't realise its worth. Too late, its a waste. Why is destiny so heartless? Why do the loving hearts bleed so much? Why is it that love is not truly love until it means nothing more? Why?
Makes me wonder. Why are real people in real life not like that? Happiness in life comes in either never or so late that one doesn't even enjoy it anymore. As one of my favorite songs goes:
Bin tere koi aas bhi naa rahi
Itne tarsey ke pyaas bhi naa rahi
Joys are joys when they come in at the right time. Too early, and we don't realise its worth. Too late, its a waste. Why is destiny so heartless? Why do the loving hearts bleed so much? Why is it that love is not truly love until it means nothing more? Why?
What is love?
Love is the wave of reassurance that washes off the qualms of battered souls. Love is the silent strength that keeps you going from the darkest hours of the night towards the promising dawn. Love is the silent strength which says even if I am mad at you I am WITH you. Love is when my presence means you need no one else. Love doesn't say "I am always with you." Love always stays with you. Love means loving unconditionally, unwaveringly and unabated. Love is not about holding hands when you are glad. Its about never letting go.
Let not past pest the today!
A cultured society is where we rear our kids with discipline and where we respect our elders wholeheartedly. So say the wise men.
If this is true then the modern world should be full of truants. We give our kids toy versions of guns and grenades to play with, teach them nursery rhymes that have their history rooted in wars, swear unmindful of their presence and attention.
But worse than that, they way we look at our elders is a shame. Does this generation hold nothing dear any longer. How mean and foul mouthed have we become?
Why are the mistakes you made in your career an offshoot of your dad's lack of awareness? Why is it a shame to be seen with your mom in public? Why are you taking forward the resentment your parents had towards their relatives to the next generation?
Huh!!! The first two questions are palpable. Whats with the uncles and aunts and cousins and all that Indian family tamasha? Why is that wrong? Takes you by surprise isn't it?
Funny but true - for the most of us, elders are just mom and dad. Why do we forget, sometimes so very conveniently, that our aunts uncles grandparents are our seniors too. That life has weathered them a lot more than it has worked on us.
If they have behaved in a certain manner, there might just be a reason for that as well. Walk in the other man's shoes before you take a dig at them. Even if there be nothing to dwell on, wasn't is bad enough already that an entire generation wasted their lifetimes building up resentments against their own kith and the kin. Must the GenNext also insist on carrying forward the legacy of hatred like nothing else matters?
Why do parents pass on their spitefulness and their bitter relationships with siblings and siblings in law to their kids? Life is not a bed of roses for anyone. We all need all the people we can ever meet and maybe then some more. Then why do we continue to pour lead into our hearts and lives? Is being good such a big deal. Is forgiving and forgetting so tough really?
To my yet to be born kids, I say this - Dear children, your mother has had a happy life. Yes, there were some sour moments. Yes, there were people who made living happily a pain. Much as you may love me, I plead with you; Do not be blind to my mistakes. Whenever I say someone hurt me, ask yourselves,"Was it really unwarranted?" And let me be candid. If you dig deep and through, you will find some instigation from my end too.
Feel sorry for me if you have to. Feel my hurt, if you cant help it. Heal my wounds, if you can. Learn the lessons from my mistakes, if you want to better your lives. But for my sake, please do not think, much less say, ill of the perpetrators.
Long after I am dead, as I watch over you from the skies above, please let рдоी be happy in knowing that of all the things I passed on to you as my legacy, bitterness towards mankind is not one of them.
Forgive people. Release them from your hatred. Rest all the accusations and resentments. My dears, I do not know what it does to those people. But for you my treasures, that will be the fastest way to heal!
If this is true then the modern world should be full of truants. We give our kids toy versions of guns and grenades to play with, teach them nursery rhymes that have their history rooted in wars, swear unmindful of their presence and attention.
But worse than that, they way we look at our elders is a shame. Does this generation hold nothing dear any longer. How mean and foul mouthed have we become?
Why are the mistakes you made in your career an offshoot of your dad's lack of awareness? Why is it a shame to be seen with your mom in public? Why are you taking forward the resentment your parents had towards their relatives to the next generation?
Huh!!! The first two questions are palpable. Whats with the uncles and aunts and cousins and all that Indian family tamasha? Why is that wrong? Takes you by surprise isn't it?
Funny but true - for the most of us, elders are just mom and dad. Why do we forget, sometimes so very conveniently, that our aunts uncles grandparents are our seniors too. That life has weathered them a lot more than it has worked on us.
If they have behaved in a certain manner, there might just be a reason for that as well. Walk in the other man's shoes before you take a dig at them. Even if there be nothing to dwell on, wasn't is bad enough already that an entire generation wasted their lifetimes building up resentments against their own kith and the kin. Must the GenNext also insist on carrying forward the legacy of hatred like nothing else matters?
Why do parents pass on their spitefulness and their bitter relationships with siblings and siblings in law to their kids? Life is not a bed of roses for anyone. We all need all the people we can ever meet and maybe then some more. Then why do we continue to pour lead into our hearts and lives? Is being good such a big deal. Is forgiving and forgetting so tough really?
To my yet to be born kids, I say this - Dear children, your mother has had a happy life. Yes, there were some sour moments. Yes, there were people who made living happily a pain. Much as you may love me, I plead with you; Do not be blind to my mistakes. Whenever I say someone hurt me, ask yourselves,"Was it really unwarranted?" And let me be candid. If you dig deep and through, you will find some instigation from my end too.
Feel sorry for me if you have to. Feel my hurt, if you cant help it. Heal my wounds, if you can. Learn the lessons from my mistakes, if you want to better your lives. But for my sake, please do not think, much less say, ill of the perpetrators.
Long after I am dead, as I watch over you from the skies above, please let рдоी be happy in knowing that of all the things I passed on to you as my legacy, bitterness towards mankind is not one of them.
Forgive people. Release them from your hatred. Rest all the accusations and resentments. My dears, I do not know what it does to those people. But for you my treasures, that will be the fastest way to heal!
Sunday, January 13, 2008
Love of a language...
As Jim Hacker observes rightly in the series Yes Minister, language can be used both to make people understand your perspective and to shield it all the same.
But thinking deeply about it, to use language as so powerful joy is indeed a joy worth killing for. When one is able to express himself(hmm, OK lets not get labelled sexist here, or maybe herself), when people are able to throw people off guard with a play of words - Ah, life is fun...
But what a shame it is, when witty minds have to tone down their conversations and dumb down their wordplay to suit the mediocrity we see all around. Away from Infosys, away from T.I.M.E, I feel the void. The void of witty conversations, the emptiness resulting from staying away from books, blogs and banter.
Today as I picked up a tattered copy of Norman Lewis, Word power made easy, it was just another feeble attempt to ward off the huge crescendo of boredom that threatened to wash me over. But with each passing moment and each turning page, my interest piqued up.
Suddenly I knew what it is, I have been missing all this while in life. Now at around 7 in the night, as the life downstairs continues unabated and might I say unmindful of my absence, as the light starts failing, with mosquitoes gnawing me off all over, I am scribbling off to glory in my notebook. And guess what, I haven't been this glad in a long long time.
At this moment, I am reminded of a dialogue from the movie Iqbal mouthed by the great Naseeruddin Shah - Everyone is born with a purpose in life. Only a lucky few realise it. Of those the are yet again a wretched few who throw it off.
Phew, how close I got to be wretched!
But thinking deeply about it, to use language as so powerful joy is indeed a joy worth killing for. When one is able to express himself(hmm, OK lets not get labelled sexist here, or maybe herself), when people are able to throw people off guard with a play of words - Ah, life is fun...
But what a shame it is, when witty minds have to tone down their conversations and dumb down their wordplay to suit the mediocrity we see all around. Away from Infosys, away from T.I.M.E, I feel the void. The void of witty conversations, the emptiness resulting from staying away from books, blogs and banter.
Today as I picked up a tattered copy of Norman Lewis, Word power made easy, it was just another feeble attempt to ward off the huge crescendo of boredom that threatened to wash me over. But with each passing moment and each turning page, my interest piqued up.
Suddenly I knew what it is, I have been missing all this while in life. Now at around 7 in the night, as the life downstairs continues unabated and might I say unmindful of my absence, as the light starts failing, with mosquitoes gnawing me off all over, I am scribbling off to glory in my notebook. And guess what, I haven't been this glad in a long long time.
At this moment, I am reminded of a dialogue from the movie Iqbal mouthed by the great Naseeruddin Shah - Everyone is born with a purpose in life. Only a lucky few realise it. Of those the are yet again a wretched few who throw it off.
Phew, how close I got to be wretched!
Friday, January 04, 2008
Taare Zameen Par - A movie or a Mirror?
What a splendid way to usher in the New Year? Crouched on the couch snuggling upto Husby while catching up with the most awaited movie of the year - Taare Zameen Par.
Being an Aamir Khan venture, no doubt we expected it to be good. But after Rang De Basanti, how much better can Aamir get? On that note, I started on. But how wrong could one possibly get. With the exception of Mela and Mangal Pandey, the perfectionist has always reached new milestones and newer heights.
But this time he excelled way beyond. He did not appeal to the mere senses. Rather this time his movie stirs the soul from within. Taare Zameen Par is something far more than "just another Aamir flick". It is a mirror. And when the world sneaks a peek into it, it sees a very ugly picture. A world wherein the ones we punish are not criminals, they are not strangers, they are our kids.
The kids that came into this world as a symbol of the love we share with our spouses. The kids we pampered till they were of three years of age. Molly-coddled them, attended to them hand and foot, giving in to their every whim and fancy. Fulfilling their stated, implied and sometimes even imagined needs.
What changes after that? Do parents stop loving their kids any less once they are in the schools? No, it’s a mere insecurity on the part of the parent. Their desire to secure the kids future. As Aamir Khan says in the movie,
"It’s a cold world out there. And everyone wants to breed toppers and rankers in their homes so that they can combat the world".
But at what cost? Each one of us can’t be on the top. Someone of us doesn’t have the capable to be able to recite the mathematic tables ad verbatim. Is that a reason to stop loving the child? Is that a reason to keep on harping about how useless, lazy and good for nothing he or she is?
Kids do have a very strong inclination towards the "vocation" that is best suited to their minds. Some have a very strong sense of shapes and this they exhibit while playing with clay and that non-toxic dough. Some love their cricket sets, their musical instruments, and their paint brushes. Every one of the kids born cannot go into the IITs or the IIMs. And how boring lives would be if they did? Imagine India without PT Usha, MS Dhoni, Sania Mirza, Zakir Hussain, Abhishek Bachan, Aishwarya Rai. How many of the IITians and IIM grads are as famous as these? And how many of them really represent India or are able to represent Indian overseas as any of these people? If Sania's parents wanted to her to be a doctor, what would the state of Indian tennis. Lost in obscurity, isn’t it?
Yes, the Indian middle class cannot dream lofty dreams but then at the same time, if your kid is not cut out for academics, what can you do? More often than not, we treat our kids as manifestations of our unfulfilled ambitions.
"I always wanted to be a software engineer, but I had to become a doctor as my dad wanted me to. Now this is my turn, my son will be a software engineer. What if all he wants to do is go ahead and expand my clinic. That is not what I think I want to make him."
You never saw eye to eye with your dad as he made you do something you never found interesting. And now as a dad, you repeat the same mistakes. How sad is that?
Being an Aamir Khan venture, no doubt we expected it to be good. But after Rang De Basanti, how much better can Aamir get? On that note, I started on. But how wrong could one possibly get. With the exception of Mela and Mangal Pandey, the perfectionist has always reached new milestones and newer heights.
But this time he excelled way beyond. He did not appeal to the mere senses. Rather this time his movie stirs the soul from within. Taare Zameen Par is something far more than "just another Aamir flick". It is a mirror. And when the world sneaks a peek into it, it sees a very ugly picture. A world wherein the ones we punish are not criminals, they are not strangers, they are our kids.
The kids that came into this world as a symbol of the love we share with our spouses. The kids we pampered till they were of three years of age. Molly-coddled them, attended to them hand and foot, giving in to their every whim and fancy. Fulfilling their stated, implied and sometimes even imagined needs.
What changes after that? Do parents stop loving their kids any less once they are in the schools? No, it’s a mere insecurity on the part of the parent. Their desire to secure the kids future. As Aamir Khan says in the movie,
"It’s a cold world out there. And everyone wants to breed toppers and rankers in their homes so that they can combat the world".
But at what cost? Each one of us can’t be on the top. Someone of us doesn’t have the capable to be able to recite the mathematic tables ad verbatim. Is that a reason to stop loving the child? Is that a reason to keep on harping about how useless, lazy and good for nothing he or she is?
Kids do have a very strong inclination towards the "vocation" that is best suited to their minds. Some have a very strong sense of shapes and this they exhibit while playing with clay and that non-toxic dough. Some love their cricket sets, their musical instruments, and their paint brushes. Every one of the kids born cannot go into the IITs or the IIMs. And how boring lives would be if they did? Imagine India without PT Usha, MS Dhoni, Sania Mirza, Zakir Hussain, Abhishek Bachan, Aishwarya Rai. How many of the IITians and IIM grads are as famous as these? And how many of them really represent India or are able to represent Indian overseas as any of these people? If Sania's parents wanted to her to be a doctor, what would the state of Indian tennis. Lost in obscurity, isn’t it?
Yes, the Indian middle class cannot dream lofty dreams but then at the same time, if your kid is not cut out for academics, what can you do? More often than not, we treat our kids as manifestations of our unfulfilled ambitions.
"I always wanted to be a software engineer, but I had to become a doctor as my dad wanted me to. Now this is my turn, my son will be a software engineer. What if all he wants to do is go ahead and expand my clinic. That is not what I think I want to make him."
You never saw eye to eye with your dad as he made you do something you never found interesting. And now as a dad, you repeat the same mistakes. How sad is that?
My heart turned inside out when I heard these lyrics from the movie -
"Bheed Mein Yun Na Chodo Mujhe
Ghar Laut Ke Bhi Aa Naa Paoon Maa
Bhej Na Itna Door Mujkko Tu
Yaad Bhi Tujhko Aa Naa Paoon Maa
Kya Itna Bura Hoon Main Maa
Unse Main Yeh Kehta Nahin
Par Main Seham Jaata Hoon Maa
Chehre Pe Aana Deta Nahin
Dil Hi Dil Mein Ghabraata Hoon Maa
Tujhe Sab Hai Pata Hai Naa Maa"
How heart wrenching? What kind of parents would want to harm the psyche of their kids in this manner? Answer: Almost everyone.
What makes the normally sane people behave in such an irrational manner while dealing with their kids? And how justified is it? We normally analyse the minute nuances of what are the hidden meanings in most of conversations we carry out - with our spouses, our managers, our friends, our crushes. Why don’t we try to understand our kids? A little bit of affection, a little bit of care. Is that too much to ask for? These are the questions the parents need to ask their kids and themselves and most importantly to the kid INSIDE them which refuse to listen to the most obvious telltale signs.
This movie asks the parents to grow up before they expect the kids to. And in reality that is what the parents need to do. GROW UP. Ending the post with my favorite dialogue from the movie -
“If all you want to do with your kids is to make them run races, then breed race horses damn it. Why give birth to kids?"
"Bheed Mein Yun Na Chodo Mujhe
Ghar Laut Ke Bhi Aa Naa Paoon Maa
Bhej Na Itna Door Mujkko Tu
Yaad Bhi Tujhko Aa Naa Paoon Maa
Kya Itna Bura Hoon Main Maa
Unse Main Yeh Kehta Nahin
Par Main Seham Jaata Hoon Maa
Chehre Pe Aana Deta Nahin
Dil Hi Dil Mein Ghabraata Hoon Maa
Tujhe Sab Hai Pata Hai Naa Maa"
How heart wrenching? What kind of parents would want to harm the psyche of their kids in this manner? Answer: Almost everyone.
What makes the normally sane people behave in such an irrational manner while dealing with their kids? And how justified is it? We normally analyse the minute nuances of what are the hidden meanings in most of conversations we carry out - with our spouses, our managers, our friends, our crushes. Why don’t we try to understand our kids? A little bit of affection, a little bit of care. Is that too much to ask for? These are the questions the parents need to ask their kids and themselves and most importantly to the kid INSIDE them which refuse to listen to the most obvious telltale signs.
This movie asks the parents to grow up before they expect the kids to. And in reality that is what the parents need to do. GROW UP. Ending the post with my favorite dialogue from the movie -
“If all you want to do with your kids is to make them run races, then breed race horses damn it. Why give birth to kids?"
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