You could tell the character of the man by the kind of books he reads - quipped someone.
Now I have liked and loved a lot of books. Then there are some which leave a lasting impression. And funnily sometimes the book is NOT written to be thought provoking. One such instance - Bridget Jones Diary. When I read it over an year ago, I could totally totally relate to the singledom ideas elucidated in there. From Woophee, Hurray, I am single!!! to Oh, Why the hell am I still single. The embarrassing Indian marriage matches hunt did nothing to quell these feelings too. But then that was it. The book was funny. You could relate to the characters. It showed back all the mistakes you did. And the in-the-end-it’s-all-well feeling. Thereon, I just let it pass.
Now, back to the present times(Hehehe, interesting concept, that phrase, aint it?). Blissfully married for almost an year now. And a book fanatic forced to give up the wonderful wonderful collection :( Thanks to the baggage restrictions. I have NOTHING to read these days. Or more appropriately HAD nothing to read until a few days ago. Ok, let me change that to I had nothing of MY choice to read until a few days back.
Now I have liked and loved a lot of books. Then there are some which leave a lasting impression. And funnily sometimes the book is NOT written to be thought provoking. One such instance - Bridget Jones Diary. When I read it over an year ago, I could totally totally relate to the singledom ideas elucidated in there. From Woophee, Hurray, I am single!!! to Oh, Why the hell am I still single. The embarrassing Indian marriage matches hunt did nothing to quell these feelings too. But then that was it. The book was funny. You could relate to the characters. It showed back all the mistakes you did. And the in-the-end-it’s-all-well feeling. Thereon, I just let it pass.
Now, back to the present times(Hehehe, interesting concept, that phrase, aint it?). Blissfully married for almost an year now. And a book fanatic forced to give up the wonderful wonderful collection :( Thanks to the baggage restrictions. I have NOTHING to read these days. Or more appropriately HAD nothing to read until a few days ago. Ok, let me change that to I had nothing of MY choice to read until a few days back.
The thing is - the house we are staying in right now was a bachelors pad. So some of the guys did not pick up after themselves while leaving. So, in effect it was was a virtual dumping ground. Apart from a few horrible things they left behind, (this being a family space, I guess I am better off NOT listing 'em) some books also were scattered around. Thankfully, they must have had the same problems with baggage restrictions. Now most of these were from authors I have no idea about. The titles did not seem interesting either. But I know myself. And I know how desperate I can get in the total absence of books(From reading the back of the milk can, butter cover, tin lids to couting the number of letters and vowels just to keep reading... Been there, done it all.). So I stashed them up in the room nevertheless. Some of them turned out interesting. Others, kept me alive during days of utter boredom.
But all that has changed now. I eventually got back to one of the most serious vows of my life - to spend 10% of my salary on books :) Well maybe not 10% now that I have a lot of stuff to do once I am home. Still I intend to buy at least one book each month. To keep my passion, hobby, interest and sense of books alive.
But all that has changed now. I eventually got back to one of the most serious vows of my life - to spend 10% of my salary on books :) Well maybe not 10% now that I have a lot of stuff to do once I am home. Still I intend to buy at least one book each month. To keep my passion, hobby, interest and sense of books alive.
And guess what was the start of it all. Edge of Reason, the sequel to the Bridget Jones diary. Now Srilu had warned me - After the Diary this one will not be THAT interesting or funny. Thanks to her warning I started off with a low expectation level. And for once, the rarity in itself, I THROUGHLY disagree with her opinion. Maybe the book is not that funny. Yes, it’s not as rib tickling now that the protagonist has kissed singledom goodbye. But I have already made up my mind, I love the sequel better than the diary.
I mean, people may find it strange. But then there are certain elements and characters in the book that made me sit back and think - Whoa! Haven't I been there too? Haven't I done something like this before? Isn't it my kind of a reaction to trifles? Now I might be eternally confused but it’s rare to find me introspecting on what I, ARCHANA, can do wrong. The Leo within does work in its own independant ways. But this time, for once it was in slumber. To my credit, I did not wake it up either.
I mean, this whole book, purportedly written in jest, made such an impact on me, I would put it right on par with Richard Bach and Shantaram. Trust me, I would recommend it to everyone. You may like it like I did or you may find it no big deal. Just read it once. My own observations are on these lines:
Rebecca - Now here is one serious thought! How many Rebeccas have I had in my own life? Friends who pretended to be friends. All the time trying to pull me down. Making sure I never had a chance to deal with my pessimism. Always highlighting my nits, more than sufficiently highlighting them and then highlighting them again in public. These are the people who shamelessly approached me at all times. Every hour asking for opinions if they as much had to fart. What is the best way to do it? Why do I think that this particular thing was best done this particular way. People who took all possible help from me all the time. But never ever acknowledged THAT in public. People who made sure wherever I was, with whomsoever, they made sure they were there too. So that they could convince themselves that all those people thought of them highly. At least higher than what they thought of me. Now, I haven’t been blind to them. It’s not that I have not noticed them. It’s just that I kept my line of thought clear of them. Or so I thought. I did not think they were worth pondering over. Like Bridget, I would keep telling myself of the "spiritual bankruptcy" one faces by not learning to overlook. But seething within nevertheless. Today I realize the futility of it all. And I know now what I should have long long time ago. There are Rebeccas in everyone's lives. The idea is you realize that there are people who love you too much to take notice of them. Srilu, Pammi, my husband, Pravs - all of them and then some more. They have been around no matter what people said. No matter how much the Rebeccas of my life tried to make sure they were more important to these people than I am.
Rebecca - Now here is one serious thought! How many Rebeccas have I had in my own life? Friends who pretended to be friends. All the time trying to pull me down. Making sure I never had a chance to deal with my pessimism. Always highlighting my nits, more than sufficiently highlighting them and then highlighting them again in public. These are the people who shamelessly approached me at all times. Every hour asking for opinions if they as much had to fart. What is the best way to do it? Why do I think that this particular thing was best done this particular way. People who took all possible help from me all the time. But never ever acknowledged THAT in public. People who made sure wherever I was, with whomsoever, they made sure they were there too. So that they could convince themselves that all those people thought of them highly. At least higher than what they thought of me. Now, I haven’t been blind to them. It’s not that I have not noticed them. It’s just that I kept my line of thought clear of them. Or so I thought. I did not think they were worth pondering over. Like Bridget, I would keep telling myself of the "spiritual bankruptcy" one faces by not learning to overlook. But seething within nevertheless. Today I realize the futility of it all. And I know now what I should have long long time ago. There are Rebeccas in everyone's lives. The idea is you realize that there are people who love you too much to take notice of them. Srilu, Pammi, my husband, Pravs - all of them and then some more. They have been around no matter what people said. No matter how much the Rebeccas of my life tried to make sure they were more important to these people than I am.
As to the ones with whom the Rebeccas succeeded - Well, I have nothing to say to them but this - You made your choice. I am sure you are happy there :) God bless you!
I know today I am far better a person now that all the weeds are out! Seriously, I owe at least a thanks to the Rebeccas of my life! I am really glad you won’t leave my life and get lost. I don’t need to keep cleaning up my emotional attics and closets. You are taking all the garbage from my life straight into yours. Ha-ha, I love you! More than I loved you when I thought you were my pals!
Shazz - Ah, it’s easier to fight Rebeccas. You know they are the enemy but what does one do when it’s all in friends. And when all that is done in good intent. Here I am to blame as well. I have also been a Shazz in so many lives. Prejudged or misjudged people in other's lives. Gave opinions unwarranted. And when all that my friends wanted was a shoulder to cry on, I painted the town black for them. Just because I wanted to make sure they are not hurt. And sometimes that's been done to me too. But then such is love. Sometimes with an intent to not hurt, we end up hurting people all the more.
Shazz - Ah, it’s easier to fight Rebeccas. You know they are the enemy but what does one do when it’s all in friends. And when all that is done in good intent. Here I am to blame as well. I have also been a Shazz in so many lives. Prejudged or misjudged people in other's lives. Gave opinions unwarranted. And when all that my friends wanted was a shoulder to cry on, I painted the town black for them. Just because I wanted to make sure they are not hurt. And sometimes that's been done to me too. But then such is love. Sometimes with an intent to not hurt, we end up hurting people all the more.
And the observation by Mark Darcy was correct too. With a gang of girls, who are really good friends, there is always this risk. Of overanalyzing, dissecting each and every uttered nuance, of finding meanings where there are none, hitting the panic button for self and others when all is really well.
To all my friends I have to say this - As I was reading the book, the truth about the 3 girlfriends- Jude, Bridget and Shazz- hit me hard and really hard too. There are times when all you want to do is let the steam off by bitching about the people you love. Most of the times, I end up relating your story to mine and depressing you all the more. See, it’s inevitable that when you tell me the issues you face with people in your life, the ones who are really important, I should compare those issues with the ones I have in my life. Now your people and my people are different!!! The ones in your life are a lot better in some respects to mine and then my folks are darlings compared to your people in some other aspects. But I tend to forget that. it will be good for you if YOU do not. I may not be in your life 10 years from now. But they might still be around. We are all building life long bonds here. Do NOT ever think my judgment will be always correct. I KNOW I don’t need to give you this particular bit of warning but then never hurts to say. I am here ALWAYS if you want to bitch about things that are not perfect in your life as you are there for me. But these are the people whom we ultimately love - all said and done, these are our people. So yes, I maybe your best friend, your listening ear and I am always ready to hear, offer free advices to all you have to say. But remember one thing, in your relationships with other people, I AM an outsider. I don’t know the dynamics of your life, at least not ALL of it for sure. I don’t even know what all is critical for you and what all is not. You and only you do. Remember THAT!
Mark Darcy – Ah! Blush! If life has thorns, then it has flowers too. If there are Rebeccas and Daniel Cleavers, there are Mark Darcys too. Rather for each life, one Mark Darcy is enough. Your person, the person whom you love like you love no one else. The one who loves you no matter what you are, how you look, what you have said and done. ONE such person and you are blessed. Maybe everyone finds someone else like that eventually. But if it’s just a select few who get so lucky, then I guess my luck has been so good that it is obscene. I have my husband and then I have Srilu. Both of them have been so bloody good to me, I feel at times I could just jump off a cliff out of sheer happiness!!! I am so blessed... If there is a life for me beyond or rather without the two of them – I am thankful to God I am unaware of it. Muaaah, I love you both...
Well well well, a long time since have blogged and for this hiatus, I guess I have returned with an awfully long post. And a ridiculously mushy one at that.
But then that is how books are. You read some you are so depressed you just don’t wish to live any longer in the mean cold world. There are others, you read them and fall off the bed, chair, table, building, whatever, rolling in laughter. And then there are a precious few like The Edge of Reason. You read them, and you are thankful. Of being alive and literate enough to read books. Truly, they have such precious lessons to teach you.
Thanks Helen. For being a friend I have never known personally.
Mark Darcy – Ah! Blush! If life has thorns, then it has flowers too. If there are Rebeccas and Daniel Cleavers, there are Mark Darcys too. Rather for each life, one Mark Darcy is enough. Your person, the person whom you love like you love no one else. The one who loves you no matter what you are, how you look, what you have said and done. ONE such person and you are blessed. Maybe everyone finds someone else like that eventually. But if it’s just a select few who get so lucky, then I guess my luck has been so good that it is obscene. I have my husband and then I have Srilu. Both of them have been so bloody good to me, I feel at times I could just jump off a cliff out of sheer happiness!!! I am so blessed... If there is a life for me beyond or rather without the two of them – I am thankful to God I am unaware of it. Muaaah, I love you both...
Well well well, a long time since have blogged and for this hiatus, I guess I have returned with an awfully long post. And a ridiculously mushy one at that.
But then that is how books are. You read some you are so depressed you just don’t wish to live any longer in the mean cold world. There are others, you read them and fall off the bed, chair, table, building, whatever, rolling in laughter. And then there are a precious few like The Edge of Reason. You read them, and you are thankful. Of being alive and literate enough to read books. Truly, they have such precious lessons to teach you.
Thanks Helen. For being a friend I have never known personally.
