Is the weaker sex actually weak?!!?

Why do women consistently outperform men at management? What makes women more successful when it comes to handling managerial activities?

Well, even though I believe that the success strategies are not different for women or men, I also believe that women do have traits that help them in any walk of life. Granted both men and women cannot taste success until they slog, put in late hours, constantly show a marked improvement in their career but the way these two halves of our society are reared makes them two different kind of individuals’ altogether. From a very early age, a woman is gifted with dolls. She is told to take care of them, attend to them, and care for them. From that stage, she assumes the role of a caretaker a giver. It builds in her the requisite characteristics that can help her work better. She learns to care, make friends and use her intuition to protect them from danger.

Multi-tasking

Women are known for juggling many tasks at the same time and still producing excellent results. Indeed Mom could make curry, listen to what Dad had to say about his day at work, call out Raghu to stop playing and come over and finish his homework while listening to me reciting the 11-table(11 ones are 11, 11 twos are twenty two…) – all at the same time. Without frowning without making it all seem like a tough job. Men usually have more trouble with this multitasking thing; missing many opportunities coz they are busy pursuing something else. A man going through a break-up is far more likely to mess up his appraisal than his ex-girl friend who can miraculously come out with a better grading in spite of crying through it all…

The Gut Factor

The most powerful advantage that women have is the development of the "intuition muscle" - following their gut instinct. Woman’s instinct. As Dan Brown put in reverence of the Sacred Feminine. Someone who doesn't listen to his inner voice and waits for perfect timing or a logical explanation of why he should start a business usually will never make that start.

The ability to connect

Women love to have a support group at work and at their personal lives. As a result she finds it easier to ask for help in her businesses. Actually, she focuses a lot on activities that can find the appropriate resources to help her out. (See Networking) Men, in contrast, sometimes wait too long before asking for help and this can often cost them heavily. Help delayed is often help denied. And no help is forthcoming if one doesn’t explicitly seek it. Especially in a corporate environment where everyone has his/her hands full anyways.

Patience/Endurance

This is an extremely important attribute for being successful. Women know naturally that you must wait in order to receive positive outcomes. Basic life processes like the menstruation cycle, pregnancy etc teach her the virtue of being able to bear it all coz it is needed. Whatever must be must be!

Branding and marketing

With all the people telling them all the time about how simple life is if they take care of how they look or how well groomed they are – Well, life is all about branding as far as women are concerned. They are told that is how it works and maybe that is true as well. Women are natural marketers. They are so passionate and enthusiastic about what they choose to do that they just do not stop talking about it. They don't forget to emphasize the benefits of their services to their potential customers. They understand how to accentuate the positive.

Networking

Women are real professionals at using their contacts. They tend to create new contacts and friendships that get them wherever they will to go. Older contacts are not erased from memory neither from phone books. Many of the women I know have maintained contacts with their friends’ right from their kindergarten to colleges. Imagine the connections and the bonds that are forged in that case. Chances of finding a successful friend – someone who can pull you and your business up will automatically shoot up if the people pool of yours is voluminous. Period!

But nothing in life can be perfect, right? If women are endowed with so many biological and psychological advantages a few disadvantages too have to exist. Well, they do!

The struggle to balance one's personal life, marriage and child-rearing with a busy work schedule, being in the center of attraction for all the wrong reasons(Men will be men after all!), the inherent feeling of guilt for having neglected the family in course of attending to the career pursuits, struggle for recognition as an individual and an independent person in a male dominated corporate world, the fight to get the right further education and a career to name a few. Women, still today, get paid less and comprise a disproportionately small percentage of managerial and executive positions coz the men (who are also the bosses) feel that when the stand - off between the family and work does come, women will still choose to attend to her family, etc.

As far as I have seen life, with a few exceptions, most of the men at my workplace are ok. But some chauvinists will always be around. For them women are and will always be the weaker sex. Fragile, demure, incapable of handling responsibilities in the big bad jungle that is the corporate world. One example at IDRBT comes to my mind on this occasion. We had this paper presentation and this gentleman was giving a dissertation on Capital Markets, which by and large is considered as men’s business. When the Q&A session happened and I asked questions that kind of put the man in question in kind of a tight spot. I remember at one particular point of contention he blurted out "You do not understand. Girls don’t know how exactly the financial institutions work"

Sigh! Men will be men after all…

Power of Punctuation! :)

A laughing riot! Got this as a forward... Pasting it here for all you folks out there who can read Hindi!

Why blog?

A woman by birth, an Indian by heart, software engineer by chance & a humorous wisecracker, avid reader, decent singer by choice. Is it all that there is to me? What am I? What is it that uniquely defines me? Humorous, Introspective, Opinionated, irascible or simply eternally confused? Maybe all of it? Then maybe nothing… What is it that I wish to do here? In this blog? Am I seeking the answers to the questions I have put forth above? Or maybe I am just letting it out in the form of words; writing ‘coz that is what comes to me as a natural way of describing my thoughts… Do I contemplate on the words that I have written but? Or do I just pen it all down, take a look, shrug & move on! I do all of it by turns. Coz there are times when you have to live your life in the fast lane. Where you cannot stop and think which way you are headed. Survival demands it. But still, there is always time to stop, look back at the times that have gone past & smile at it all. My blog – my tribute to the life God gave me, to the times gone by leaving behind some of the beautiful memories I know I will treasure for the rest of my life & to those important lessons I’m glad I learnt the hard way. I blog to put the life I lead in a proper perspective. To pause in between the infernal rush and to thank everyone who loved me & to all those who dint - ‘coz they made me realize the value of love. My blog is my reminder of the times in life where I was at my happiest best. Of times, where I was an unrelenting fool who thought it was better to break than to bend and mend. Of the happiness that I sought and found. The love I lost in someone else and found within… My blog is to tell myself - Yes! Archana... We did it... You are a survivor and I am proud of you...

The little Rascals!

Every one who has had the chance to talk to me about children and their antics has heard one or more of these anecdotes for sure. But for all those, I haven’t ever met personally and for all those who feel guilty for troubling their parents as kids, making their lives a living nightmare, let me succor you… The next time Mom tells you, how impossible a kid you were make her come to my page and read this article and she will look at you as if you were a cherubic angel : )
--*--
Raghu and I have been impossible kids ever since the day we were born.
1.) Annam Parabrahma Swaroopam

The “Food is God’s manifestation” lesson was so much abused by my brother that the effects resound till date as Archana, the glutton. He used to make me eat both the Tiffin-boxes, mom used to pack so that he could use the lunch interval in more *useful* pursuits e.g.: Football/Competing with classmates over the number of Pani-puris each of them could gobble.

2.) Theory of Origin of the enigma called Archana Amperayani

Then again, I was supposedly not born of my parents. One evening when Dad, Mom and Raghu were out on a stroll, I was lying in the dustbin and dogs were licking me. [As one can gather, Rags has one hell of a dirty imagination… Cancerian to the T].Mom took pity on me and got me home against his sane advice, I was told…

Fact: When I was born, and when for the first time he saw me THESE were his exact words. “Khampu kothundi… Deenini venekkicheddam!” – Translation: She stinks. Let’s give her back. : (

3.) THE Story of our lives OR Those who have an elder brother will survive

When he was around 2-3 years old and I was of 8 months of age, Dad and Mom were performing the Ganesh Chaturthi Pooja. I was in the *macharrdaani* (domateraa/ mosquito net) on the bed and he was asked to look after me for as long as the Pooja time.

Restless little brat that he was, he got bored after some time and inspired by the Ramayana he had seen recently, he tucked Dads silk dhoti in his half pant ala Hanuman and lighted it. Chanting “Jai Ram Ji, Jai Lakshman Ji”, he went all around the nylon mosquito net. In no time, the whole thing was up in flames. He realized his folly and with all the strength a 3 year old could muster, took me up and threw me off the bed. And sat down, on the bed [till date, I dint understand why he dint jump off the bed too] waiting for the last minute.

The impact of falling on the ground made me go aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawling in a loud voice and mom and dad rushed to find the baby on the floor and the elder son – a picture of gloom – on the bed waiting to die. The fire wasn’t that big, dad tells me but mom was like “Ee Pooja kadu kaani iroji naa iddarru pillallu chachipoinde vallu” [Trans: “Leave the worship aside, today both of my kids would have been dead”]

If you thought Raghu was a devil incarnate, Hark! I haven’t been any less of a punishment on the noble souls dad and mom have been…

4.) Miss India wannabe?!!?

When I was young, I had these heavy tresses that were a treat to the eyes and silk to the touch but a punishment for Mom to wash. Poor thing! Every Sunday, after the grueling session she had would have to doze off to rest her aching arms. THAT I would be screaming at the top of my lungs all the time did little to mitigate her exhaustion. On one such day, after she was done with the washing part, she left me sitting in the sun to let my hair dry and went out for an errand.

I was sitting on the porch of the house facing the road wondering why mom did such a lousy job of washing my hair (The thankless wretch I was!). I swore to myself that the smell of Parachute oil was still dominating over the Shikakai. While I sat musing solemnly about such a grave matter my eyes rested on – DISCLAIMER: Well! If you are overtly genteel in manners, you would do good to STOP reading at this point of time. The author is not to be blamed for any disturbances in the tummy experienced as an aftermath of finishing the rest of the story – goat’s droppings! Yes sire! Now all of you out there who have had the chance to spot this natural residue and the seeds of shikakai can immediately relate the similarities between the two.

Assuming that I these WERE shikakai seeds AND that I could do a better job of washing my own hair than my mom, I took those things up and start rubbing them vigorously against my hair. The emanating stench DID make me stop and think for a while that something might be wrong, but then I thought if I rubbed it more vigorously maybe it would start lathering and stop the smell. But well, Shikakai is shikakai and something else remains something else no matter what you do! To sum it up, I got a well-deserved sound trashing that day and well, another wash too (Poor Mom!)

Then there were numerous other instances. I don’t know which all to list and which to omit. Dad and mom dreaded going out shopping leaving the two of us behind all by ourselves. And the true Shravan kumars that we were, we never faltered on living up to their expectations. Our fights are a legion in the neighborhoods that we grew up in. The tiffs that we had DID lessen once Raghu went to hostel to do his graduation but till this date we just cant stay without at least an argument WITHIN 24 hours of meeting up. Yes Sir, Even today. And as you read this, Raghu is 27 years old (23-July-1978) and yours truly will be hitting on 25 (08-Aug-1981) soon...

No wonder then, Mom still thinks we are the worst kids in terms of mischief that God could inflict on ANYONE and Dad swears(jokingly, of course) he will have absolutely nothing to do with our kids. To put it in his own words, “Mee iddarru mamallni kalchukoni tinattu mee pillallu kuda mimallmi peekutarru. Appudu nenu mummy happy ga choosthu kurchuntamu” : ) [Trans:The way you have tormented us, your kids will also do the same to you. Then as you suffer, mom and I will sit watching gaily at all that is happening!]

I swear if I have kids who are anything like me, I am seriously going to dump then on a scrap-heap. And as dogs lick them, I hope that someone as gullible as my parents will find them and take them home. And when they do, God help the poor souls!! : )

Serendipity - II

God only knows what all I have stored on my system (esp my songs folder)!!!

Why? It was just yesterday that I found a song that I never knew even existed on my system. And today, the song I have been searching like crazy for over 4 months now… :O I just can’t believe Tinka Tinka – THE song I have feverishly hunted for, browsed for, searched for… And all the while the sweet little thing was just a click away… Now if that isn’t queer I don’t know what else is!!!
Two days in a row – I thought I must sit down and see ALL the songs that I have on me. But then, browsing through all 11 GB of it isn’t such a palatable idea as well… So have given up on the thought too. Until the next time, until the next search, until the next search, I will let the sleeping dogs lie I believe…

Sample this!

"
“Do you believe in God, Mr. Langdon?”
The question startled him.
.
.
.
“I want to believe,” he heard himself say.
.
.
.
“So why don’t you?”
He chuckled. “Well, it’s not that easy. Having faith requires leaps of faith, cerebral acceptance of miracles- immaculate conceptions and divine interventions. And then there are the codes of conduct. The Bible, the Koran, Buddhist scripture . . . they all carry similar requirements-and similar penalties. They claim that if I don’t live by a specific code I will go to hell. I can’t imagine a God who would rule that way.”
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“Yes. As a scientist and the daughter of a Catholic priest, what do you think of religion?”
Vittoria paused, brushing a lock of hair from her eyes. “Religion is like language or dress. We gravitate toward the practices with which we were raised. In the end, though, we are all proclaiming the same thing. That life has meaning. That we are grateful for the power that created us.”
Langdon was intrigued. “So you’re saying that whether you are a Christian or a Muslim simply depends on where you were born?”
“Isn’t it obvious? Look at the diffusion of religion around the globe.”
“So faith is random?”
“Hardly. Faith is universal. Our specific methods for understanding it are arbitrary. Some of us pray to Jesus, some of us go to Mecca, some of us study subatomic particles. In the end we are all just searching for truth, that which is greater than ourselves.”
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“And God?” he asked. “Do you believe in God?”
Vittoria was silent for a long time. “Science tells me God must exist. My mind tells me I will never understand God. And my heart tells me I am not meant to.”
... “So you believe God is fact, but we will never understand Him.”
"
-----------------
"
Chartrand took a deep breath. “I don’t understand this omnipotent-benevolent thing.”
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“You are confused because the Bible describes God as an omnipotent and benevolent deity.” “Exactly.” “Omnipotent-benevolent simply means that God is all-powerful and well-meaning.”
“I understand the concept. It’s just . . . there seems to be a contradiction.”
“Yes. The contradiction is pain. Man’s starvation, war, sickness . . .”
“Exactly!”
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“Terrible things happen in this world. Human tragedy seems like proof that God could not possibly be both all-powerful and well-meaning. If He loves us and has the power to change our situation, He would prevent our pain, wouldn’t He?”
The camerlegno frowned. “Would He?”
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“Well . . . if God loves us, and He can protect us, He would have to. It seems He is either omnipotent and uncaring, or benevolent and powerless to help.”
“Do you have children, Lieutenant?”
Chartrand flushed. “No, signore.”
“Imagine you had an eight-year-old son . . . would you love him?”
“Of course.”
“Would you do everything in your power to prevent pain in his life?”
“Of course.”
“Would you let him skateboard?” Chartrand did a double take. The camerlegno always seemed oddly “in touch” for a clergyman. “Yeah, I guess,” Chartrand said. “Sure, I’d let him skateboard, but I’d tell him to be careful.”
“So as this child’s father, you would give him some basic, good advice and then let him go off and make his own mistakes?”
“I wouldn’t run behind him and mollycoddle him if that’s what you mean.”
“But what if he fell and skinned his knee?”
“He would learn to be more careful.”
The camerlegno smiled. “So although you have the power to interfere and prevent your child’s pain, you would choose to show your love by letting him learn his own lessons?”
“Of course. Pain is part of growing up. It’s how we learn.”
The camerlegno nodded. “Exactly.”
"
-- Excerpts from Angels & Demons by Dan Brown...

Faith?

Havent we all wondered if God was watching us at all at times? Remember all those nights you spent crying under the sheets wondering why all this happened to you? Looking beseechingly at Him wondering Why He hasnt done anything as yet? Does He listen? Does He care? Is He is even aware that you exist?
I have had more than my share of those times too! And after 24 years of a changing relationship with Him, i have realised just one thing... He sees, He listens, He DOES care... Its just that His ways are a little unique. He wants me to be happy, He really does. He whispers in my ears when He thinks I am being silly, adamant and irascible... Asks me to slow down. Take life as it comes. Not to rush into every moment with a quixotic preconcieved notion of how it should look. He asks me to take out time and smell the roses. To really trust Him!
But how many times do I do it? How many times do YOU do it? We all have made a pact of sorts with God! We do all the mistakes that can easily be avoided. We fall into pitfalls knowingly. Make wrong kind of friends. Get into wrong relationships. Fall in love with the person who we know is not right for us. Work a lot less than what is needed to better our lives. And then when the results arrive, we accuse Him of being mean. Brand him as thoughtless, uncaring, stone-hearted, unfair and what not! Are we fair to Him? Do we care for Him?
It seems silly and ridiculous to a lot who may read this. But He does talk to me. When I am at my confused best, He warns me of the perils ahead... Of the mistakes I have made in the past, of the follies I am commiting today! He tells me,"Archana! Stop being a kid now!"
It hurts him when I hurt myself, when I ignore His words of sense and wisdom. But he doesn't stop loving me and responding still. Then why should we be so judgemental about Him? In this world, where every other relationship is transitory and illusionary and yet we give them all the chances they don't deserve... Then why don't we ever give the truest love a chance as well?
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I am not sure why I wrote this article. Just felt this has been pending for a long time now!

Serendipity!

Just this morning, I was wondering - Why almost all my favorite songs are the sung by male singers? Why is it that the most beautiful of the lyrics and the most soulful music are rendered by the other sex? Well, that doesnt change the beauty of the song, but then there are those occasions you feel like cooing a VERY romantic or a VERY beautiful number, you hear yourself saying, "Geet gata hoon main, gungunata hoon main" Or "Pukarta chala hoon main" :)))

The words express the thoughts that I am feeling at the moment so adequately but the implied gender of the singer spoils the whole fun for me :(

Well, I chanced upon a harmless looking .mp3 titled "Chandan sa badan" a few hours later. Imagine my surprise when Lata Mangeshkar's voice oozed out of the Winamp. I never knew this all time favorite had a female version too! I listened to it with skeptism. After all, more often than not when there are two versions to a song and one of it is SO famous the other one kind of pales in comparison. But God! This was heavenly... If all you people out there have just heard the Mukesh version of this masterpiece, please please get a hang of the female version... Its addictive! Am pasting the lyrics for the same below:

chandan saa badan chanchal chitawan
dheere se teraa ye musakaanaa
mujhe dosh naa denaa jagawaalon
ho jaaye agar dil deewaanaa

ye wishaal nayan jaise neel gagan
panchhee kee tarah kho jaaoo main
sirahaanaa jo ho teree baahon kaa
angaaro pe so jaaoo mai
meraa bairaagee man dol gayaa(Wow!)
dekhee jo adaa teree mastaanaa

tan bhee sundar, man bhee sundar
too sundarataa kee murat hai
kisee aaur ko shaayad kam hogee
mujhe teree bahot jarurat hai
pahale bhee bahot dil tarasaa hai
too aaur naa dil ko tarasaanaa

Good music is indeed the best kick you can get!