Looking back...

Wonder what could have happened,
If not what eventually did,
Would life have taken a different turn,
Or would it still be this squalid.

How many mistakes and bad choices,
How many wrong paths have I tread,
To have to remember all of them,
Or to account for them I do dread.

I have been a fool,
I have given up too soon,
I have stayed stuck at wrong places,
I have always wanted the wrong boon.

I remember where I was once,
I remember not liking it there,
And now that I have traveled,
I am not liking it here either.

It nags at me so intensely,
The knowledge of all that I lack,
And I know I could have had it all,
And so, I keep looking back...

Politics politics everywhere, not a moment to think...

Wonder how our perceptions are so narrow. I always used to despise the petty petty politics back home. MPs throwing mikes in the assembly, adarniya lalooji making a mockery of the rail budget, behen Mayawati, Mulayam ji... Param pujya Amar Singh ji...

Gosh, I feel sick even as I type...

But cut to 2010. Australia. A representative of masses is kicked out by his own party within a fortnight with collusion with the powerful mining lobby. A lady comes from nowhere to be the "First female prime minister of Australia." Early elections are called. The public disgusted by the leading party's petty politics denounce them in huge numbers and opposition being no good either doesn't get a majority. So what happens? 72 seats each with 4 more needed from the 6 independents. And begins the Rajneeti.

Each side maintains a clear moral stand in public refusing to bad mouth the other. But each of them is trying to woo the independents. If one says yes to letting Treasury evaluate the detailed costings of each party's policies, the other takes the "moral high ground" in not caving in to letting the independent in on the government confidential information. Offers of ministries in return of support is gaining credence in the media too. How so very same to the coalition policies of the Indian counterparts?

Is politics clean anywhere at all? Aren't we all the same beneath the superficial differences!!!

The dilemma of a NRI...

Of all the people who migrate to other countries, South Asia has been at forefront. Of all those countries, Indians are taking a lead. Of all the Indians who have moved out of the "Old country", most of them have a strange hate-love relationship with the country.

Its filth, squalor, corruption, petty politics and "adulterated" life frustrates them. Yet every 26th January, every 15th August, every teej tyohaar is spent crying buckets of tears, its straight to the Indian restaurants on weekends and special days, visits to the temple, carrying out of religious rituals just like how its done back "home" - all these things give a sense of pride. If we sit and think to where we belong - Its always India...

Ours is a generation of paradoxes. We study medicine and engineering but still adhere to the age-old rituals and superstitious. We wish to earn in dollars, live in the comfortable "Western world", but are reluctant to cut the umbilical cord. We show up the Kamasutra as a proof of our sexual enlightenment and yet cringe at the very thought of sex education. We want our kids to have the best upbringing these countries can provide, yet we nurture the deepest desire that our kids will marry "Indian" and preferably in the social/caste hierarchy of the family.

An "Indian Origin" Peter Russells can make fun of our idiosyncrasies and we all can laugh at it. But if a Joel Stein dares to write about us, we will make bonfires of his articles and his snapshots will be thrown in for a good measure. We can crib about the squalor and dirt in India to our hearts content. We are just giving our opinion. If a foreign tourist complains, he is being a nagger. A guy goes out at 2 in the night in Mumbai and is robbed, he was a fool to be out that late in the night. A guy goes out at 2 in the night in Melbourne and is robbed, well dint we say that Australians are a racist lot?

While we gloat about how fresh milk and fruits are out "here", we still load spices and pickles from India. While we declare that this is the way/place to live, we still secretly despise the "Western influence" on the Indian culture. While we are completely ignorant of the beautiful language that Sanskrit is, we gloat in pride about "our heritage" of Vedas and Upanishads. Sadly, while our bodies live in these "Developed" countries, our hearts are still in India. And THAT precisely is the dilemma of the confused NRI.

Murphy's laws for the new mother.

1. As soon as you are done vacuuming, the baby wants to eat finger foods.
2. As you start changing a dirty diaper, the phone/door-bell will ring.
3. Likability of a food item is inversely proportional to the availability.
4. Soiled socks are always in pairs, washed ones are always single.
5. The day you throw in the sweaters for washing will be the coldest one of the year.
6. If you are running low on diapers, the baby will have diarrhoea.
7. Whatever is on the plate goes to the floor, whatever is on the floor goes into the mouth.
8. If you order pizza for dinner, the toddler will stay up late. If you are cooking healthy baby foods especially for her, the nap time comes an hour too early.
9. If the toddler has to throw up, it will be after you have brushed her teeth for the night.
10. The high priced toy that catches her fancy in the toy store will be forgotten as soon as its paid for.

Need help with an African Chant guys!!!

Now, this title may intrigue some. Interest few others and drive the rest of them nuts! B.E, Infosys, Living in Sydney and superstitious?

Well there are times and situations when the normal human mind cannot explain what is happening around/to you! I am currently in such a situation. Life is at a crossroads and I know why NOT! I mean imagine this - I have a 100% track record of converting interviews to offers. I.e. never been interviewed and not offered the job. But of 100 jobs I have applied to in the past 10 months, I have been granted interviews just twice. Once for a leading bank here at Australia and the other for a leading service provider.

The bank was almost through. I got the offer. I flew all the way from India cutting a vacation short to join. Then, the morning before the job was scheduled to begin there comes up a glitch in the contract that was never mentioned. HR and I differ on the same and offer is withdrawn!!! What the....!!! And to think, I am normally not the kinds to speak in a "tone" to anyone let alone a prospective firm! Uggghh...

That was huge setback, one from which I never really recovered. I know once I land in a job the sting will be gone. But that "next job" has been eluding me for over 1.5 years now.

Then enter fray, this leading service provider... 3 interviews later, they decided I was too technical for them and conduct 2 more interviews for yet another of their vertical, presumably technical. 5 interviews in all, then a call to discuss choice of location etcetera. It been 6 months since I have been interviewing with them and they are still moving my case forth and back. Seems they want to see what work can they allocate me before making that offer!

Why am I landing in such a soup. Each passing day, week, month my resume gets weaker and the gap wider. People say the inevitable - Fudge the details, play around with the dates, close in the gap, build up a totally new resume. That is NOT me! Has never been... But what is the result of the stand that I have taken?

Then again personal front has been a crib tale as well... Health, finances, future - EVERYTHING is in doldrums...

Desperate times needs desperate measures.... So searching for that elusive recipe for success....Anyone?!?!?

Social networking - A great way to stay connected(get kicked)...

Alas! India Inc. sees yet another bright spark fade away into the darkness of oblivion (I hope not!) as Shashi Tharoor sends his resignation to the PM and he accepts it.

The newspapers are quick to dissect the whole issue and claim "He had it coming...". One underlying theme that keeps recurring is the use of social networking site Twitter. Both Tharoor and his now-nemesis Lalit Modi have been active on the site and this is what the media says was the beginning of the end.

Tharoor especially was in the media bad books as all that they could should or would have conveyed to the masses with their input was directly being told to the people who cared to listen. Was this the crime that cost Tharoor dearly? He sure did not make fans of the high and mighty with his cattle class theories and the daily updates.

And that makes me wonder - Why do the people in authority really worry about people who like to have a lives OUTSIDES of their profession? What does it matter to the media if a Tharoor or an Amitabh decide to talk to the people who matter? What is the harm or impropriety if they wish to give their version of the story directly to the society?

Interestingly, there was an article in the ToI that complimented Microsoft for having the most social media savvy employees. Amazing, how the most successful company (arguably) in the world takes great pride in letting its employees have a life outside of the campus even when they are on it. On the other hand, Indian Inc., the so-called harbinger of the IT revolution, takes great pains in making sure their employees cannot browse even the most basic of sites. Some of these companies even pose great restrictions on the OUTLOOK as well. The size of attachments that can be sent through official emails, the IDs that can be communicated with etc all are monitored ad nauseum. Why do their HRs ponder or lament over the brain drain or the high attrition rates then?

Why cant a minister, who has been given that post by the mandate of the very common man he is talking to, converse with his people without a middle man? Why cant an Amitabh, a RGV or an Aamir connect to their audiences without the media playing the essential go-between? Why cant a software engineer who works day and night for the company (which refuses to share even a fair percentage of profits its making on his toil and prefers manicuring the lawns or build inanely positioned buildings instead with it) take a healthy break away from the maddeningly dull work? And why are all these people suddenly bad boys?

Someone needs to point out the ultimate irony of this Indian mindset. We are the largest democracy in the world. We guarantee to all the citizens of this country the freedom of speech and the freedom of expression of thought. But what is meant to be in theory never translates into reality. Or is it just that like everything else in India what we preach is what we shall seldom practise? As someone pointed out in one of the numerous articles I have read since this morning - the man who had 20 years of illustrious career overseas has been undone in less than an year in the great country called India. Some homecoming, huh?